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[ September 22, 2017 ]

A Stella Open Thread

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Vanity Fair: “Milo Yiannopoulos’s Fyre-Festival Free Speech Week Is Canceled, Says Everyone but Milo”

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Czech President Zeman: Islamic Refugees are a Trojan Horse Phenomenon

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Belgium: 119 Islamic Institutions Investigated for “Extremism” in 2016

[ September 22, 2017 ]

In Pamela Geller beheading plot, Muslims ‘hoped to achieve martyrdom’

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Britain First leaders charged with harassing Muslim rapists

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Iran President Hassan Rouhani: Security for Israel ‘Not Possible’

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Muslims who plotted to behead Pamela Geller “laughed wildly about beheadings”

[ September 22, 2017 ]

Viktor Orban Calls George Soros a ‘Public Enemy’

[ September 22, 2017 ]

ACLU, Speakers Distance Themselves From UC Berkeley’s Free Speech Week

Jeep’s Blues on an Open Thread


Friday night chill and it’s hot, languid and lovely. Johnny Hodges, “Jeep’s Blues”

Written by Duke Ellington and Johnny Hodges, I prefer Hodges’ sparer rendition but the Duke’s is killer (below)

  • EJO


  • EJO

    You’re going to love this. I guarantee it.
    Busby Berkeley

  • Andy_Lewis
  • EJO

    By the sea, by the sea, by the beautiful sea.

    You and I, you and I, oh how happy we’ll be.
    1. A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said “I am here because my house burned down and everything I owned was burned. The insurance company paid for everything”.

    “That is quite a coincidence” said the engineer “I am here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything”.

    The lawyer looked somewhat confused and asked:

    “How do you start a flood?”

    2. Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets “Do you want to go to heaven?” The man said “I do, Father”. The priest said “Then stand over there against the wall”.

    Then the priest asked the second man “Do you want to go to heaven?” “Certainly, Father” was the man’s reply. “Then stand over there against the wall” said the priest.

    Then Father Murphy walked up to O’Toole and said “Do you want to go to heaven?” O’Toole said “No, I don’t Father”.

    The priest said “I don’t believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don’t want to go to heaven?” O’Toole said “Oh, when I die, yes.

    But, I thought you were getting a group together to go right now”.

    3. Back and forth… back and forth… in and out… in and out… a
    little to the right… a little to the left… she could feel the sweat
    on her forehead… between her breasts… and, trickling down the small of her back… she was getting near to the end. He was in ecstasy… with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved… forwards then backwards… forward then backward… again… and again… her heart was pounding now… her face was
    flushed… she moaned… softly at first, then began to groan louder… finally… totally exhausted… she let out a piercing

    “OK, OK, you smug bastard, I can’t parallel park. You do it!”

    4. The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students. Taking him aside after class one day, she asked “George, why has your school work been so poor lately?” “I’m in love” the boy replied.

    Holding back an urge to smile, she asked “With whom?” “With you” he said. “But George” she said gently “don’t you see how silly that is? It’s true that I would like a husband of my own someday. But I don’t want a child”.

    “Oh, don’t worry” the boy said reassuringly “I’ll use a rubber”.

    5. An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest’s breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

    He says “Sir, have you been drinking?” “Just water” says the priest. The trooper says “Then why do I smell wine?” The priest looks at the bottle and says:

    “Good Lord! He’s done it again!”

    6. A typical macho man married a typical good looking lady, and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules.

    “I’ll be home when I want, if I want, what time I want, and I don’t
    expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table, unless I tell you that I won’t be home for dinner. I’ll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card playing when I want with my old buddies, and don’t you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?”

    His new bride said, “No, that’s fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o’clock every night, whether you’re here or not.”

    7. How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

    A: Just Juan.

    8. What did the blonde say when she saw the Cheerios box?

    “Omg! Donut seeds!”

    9. A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death.

    Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all.

    After a long life together, Frank was the first to die.

    True to his word, he made the first contact: “Kris, Kris, can you hear me?”

    “Is that you, Frank?”

    “Yes, I’ve come back like we agreed.”

    “That’s wonderful! What’s it like?”

    “Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it’s off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch (and Kris, you’d be proud — lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it’s back to the golf course again. Then it’s more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again.”

    “Oh, Frank! I’m kinda shocked! … Are you in Heaven?”

    “No — I’m a rabbit somewhere in Arizona.”

    10. A trucker who has been out on the road for two months stops at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, “I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!”

    The Madam is astonished. “But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my prettiest ladies and a three-course meal.” The trucker replies, “Listen darlin’, I’m not horny”

    “I’m just homesick.”

    • Roha Waha

      Your post got me laughing first thing in the morning and really started the day right.

    • Steve

      Here’s one i heard recently.

      A blind young lady was getting ready to go out on a date with a 70 year old man she had met on the internet – (no offense to anyone out there).

      The man arrived at the young lady’s house and picked her up and so they went out to eat and take a drive afterwards and then he brought her home.

      When she got home the young blind lady’s sister asked her how her blind date had gone and she responsed, “Well, everything was fine but i had to slap him three times.” Her sister asked her curious, “Oh, did he get fresh with you?” The young blind lady answered, “No, I thought he was dead!”

  • livingengine
  • Madmotorman™ ®

    Is it just me or is the ad people causing anyone else posting problems.

  • chris wolf

    Never was there a bigger misnomer, announced by the most appropriately named sports talk sports dupe Tom Looney, than “Fun Fact” — “The most populous muslim country is Indonesia!”
    Looney is such a whimpering liberal coward, capitulating to PC autocracy on all fronts at every opportunity, he just loves to smugly and self-righteously toss out “islam” and other atrocities with a passive aggressive normalizing air, daring anyone to ask, what could possibly be “fun” about an equatorial sewer full of muslims?
    What a disgrace.

  • marble

    …and, she has great taste in music. Is t here anything you don’t do well, you know, cook, laundry, windows (with a small “w”) … Ellington had the best sax section! A suggestion, B. Goldman’s Carnegie Hall Concert, 1938, “Honeysuckle Rose,” featuring the All Star Team of jazz, talent from Goodman, Ellington, and Basie.

  • Zoomie72

    I agree Pamela. Johnny’s version sounds like a jazz band where Duke’s has more of a Big Band sound.

  • Steve

    Here’s a diversified range of great songs with a surprise at the end: Marcus Roberts “Shout’em Aunt Tillie Keith Jarrett “True Blues” Mose Allison “Modest Proposal” Meredith Axelrod and Craig Ventresco “Red Lips Kiss My Blues Away” Annette Hanshaw “Am I Blue” Meredith Axelrod and Craig Ventresco “When I Was Cowboy” Bob Dylan Roll on John Black Pastor Brings the House Down….

  • David C. Telliho

    Thank you ! Ms. geller ! Wife is in Neb. for the week. Home alone w/no adult supervision. This made my evening. Thank you !!

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